With the recovery of Harry and longing to reunite the family, it was an executive decision for Sam and Rita to move back to Palm Beach. With Chris's help the move only took a week. Though the love between Chris and Rita were evident, they both steered of the possibilities. They knew that both of them were still not ready, and both were still fearful of a re-occurrence of what happened last time they got together. Rita and Sam moved in with Fran and Harry after much persuasion. Chris lived in the Lipshitz's basement. They were finally a family in one roof.
"Hello" Chris answered the phone breathless from his morning jog.
"Are you jogging without me again Cous?" Chris broke into a grin as he heard his cousin's voice.
"IZ!!!!" he screamed in her ear.
"Ouch Chris, that's all right I didn't need that ear drum."
"How are ya?"
"I'm good. Now listen I'm just honoring a promise, I just wanted to tell you that as of Monday I am a Palm Beach University student."
"You did it? Oh my God, they let you."
"You my dear cousin know my parents a little too well. Remember don't get too attached to the idea, I have plans on transferring next semester. I only agreed to Palm Beach because they felt safer that you were in the same town." Chris was nodding his head. He remembered the conversations he had with Isabella about travelling and her parents firm hold of her and her independence. As Chris got to know the family well, he charmed them all. Including her parents. It was his say that swayed her parents to let her go.
"Where are you going stay? I could ask the Lipshitz. I'm sure they won't mind…and it's not as if I have plans on staying here forever. I'll get a place and we can be roomies."
No way cousin. I am not imposing on your boss. Besides you're supposed to be rebuilding your life, not babysitting your long lost cousin. I've made arrangements to board in the dorms. The principal, is that what you call it there? Anyway, he got me a job too."
"You're not washing dishes Isabella. I am not letting you come all the way here to study and work at McDonalds. I don't think so."
His concern and protectiveness touched her greatly. They met only years before but as soon as they were introduced as cousin, by chance, she felt a connection to him and vice versa. It seems as though her family was the only one interested in keeping the ties together. They welcomed him into their home. Even though it was only her mother he had ever met and that was way back when he was still a little boy. The family tree states that Benny Lorenzo's father was brothers with Isabella's Mom's, mother. The blood was thin but blood it was. When they heard that Chris was in Sydney they tracked him down and ushered him out of the motel room he was temporarily residing in till he found a job. He was immediately thrown into their guestroom and introduced to even more family. Isabella was the only child of his Aunt Maria. She always longed for siblings, just like Chris. The two adopted each other instantly. From the first meeting Chris had taken on the role of big brother and as years progressed, he got more and more protective. Too protective at times.
"No Christopher, I am not working at McDonalds. Mr. Evans read my portfolio, you know with the stuff I wrote. Anyway, he talked to the Campus Editor and got me a job. It doesn't pay much, but he said with the experience I get from working there I could score one in the local paper, depending on what my interests are. Whether news or fiction. But I'll tell you about it when I get there."
"I'm picking you up." It wasn't a question. What it was, was a bold statement that left no room for arguments. Isabella sighed. She knew there was no way around it.
"Chris, I don't want to bother you. I'm sure you'll be working."
"Then I'll take the day off. Don't argue with me. Or I'll call your Mom." He threatened with a smile on his face.
You're cruel and I'll remember that. Alright, I get in on Saturday." Isabella grumbled as she told him the details of her flight. As much as she had grown to love her cousin she was frustrated. He was becoming as bad as her parents. Isabella was still uncomfortable about depending on him. Considering the bloodline was a little thin. She didn't want to burden him, knowing he was still trying to rebuild his life. After his return to Palm Beach he and Isabella kept in constant contact with each other. It surprised and warmed Isabella's heart to know that he was still the cousin/brother he had become to be in her life while he was staying with them.
When Rita walked down the stairs Chris had just put the phone down. He was grinning from ear to ear, anxious to have family. While he was overseas, he met Isabella's cousins from her father's side and they welcomed him with open arms just as Isabella had. They had many fun times and he had never felt kinship the way he had with Isabella and it excited him that she would be near by.
"What's got you so happy?" Rita asked. Chris just smiled broadly.
"Izzy’s is coming. She enrolls to Palm Beach University Monday, and start when the summer is over."
"Oh Chris that sounds great. I know how you guys have grown awfully close these last years."
"Oh Sammy, it was the greatest, sitting there all night talking to my cousin. For years I have always wanted a little sister and I got one." Rita placed her hand over his and gave it a gentle squeeze. Before they could continue their conversation Sam came running out of her room hurrying to breakfast, she was almost late for school.
"Hey Mom, Dad. Have to rush, slept in. Love you." She kissed them both and rushed out of the house.
"Well, she's in a little bit of hurry."
"She was up half the night reading. I'm sure she'll be thrilled when you tell her that Iz is coming. I'm sure she'd want to go to the airport with you. You are going to pick her up aren't you?"
Chris nodded."Much to her dismay. She thinks that she's intruding in my life, that she'll be a burden on me. Sam, would you come with me?" Rita grinned.
"Of course." In the last few months that she and Chris worked on their friendship and their family, she had gotten the opportunity to talk to and get to know Isabella. Chris spoke of her so often and called her just as much that they had all gotten to know her at least a little. Especially Sam. Sam was thrilled to finally have an almost cousin, someone around her own age as family. Isabella and Sam exchanged e-mail daily and Sam was the first to know about her move to Palm Beach and was sworn to secrecy till she was ready to tell Chris. It was Sam who convinced her to call him before she arrived. Sam definitely had her father's persuasive skills.
Saturday came fast but not fast enough for the Lorenzo clan. Chris and Sam were so excited that it swept through the Lipshitz home. Even Fran and Harry were fretting scolding Chris for not convincing her to stay with them too. They stood by the gates as they waited for her to emerge from them. Chris kept looking at his watch, while Sam kept scanning the room afraid that they might have missed her.
"Would you stop that. She'll be here." Rita teased. As she said the words Isabella walked out of the gates and scanned the room for a familiar face. She spotted Rita first and broke into a grin. She watched Chris's face light up as he saw her. As Isabella headed towards them she couldn't help but notice what a lovely family they made, she was happy that her cousin finally found what he'd always longed for.
Chris ran towards her and engulfed her in one of his famous hugs. Isabella dropped her bags from his fierce hug. Rita and Sam laughed as they waited for their turn.
"Oh Squirt. It's so nice to see you. I've missed you." Isabella hugged him back just as hard. The feeling was mutual.
"You know Chris I hated that term the first time you called me that when I was 15, what makes you think I would love it now that I'm 21. But then again, no one else could get away with calling me that except for you."
"You got that right." When he finally let go, he introduced her to Rita and Sam. "Iz, this is Rita." Rita smiled at her warmly and gave her hand a shake.
"It's nice to finally meet you Iz. It's nice to put a face on the voice. It feels like I know you after everything." Iz nodded.
"Likewise. Just remember. Chris tends to be biased when it comes to me.
I'm not as sweet as he projects me to be."
"Neither is he." She teased. Iz laughed.
"Before you two start firing out the insults, Isabella. I would like you to meet Sam. Though I believe you know each other well." Isabella turned to Sam and smiled. Without a single thought or reservation the two hugged. Chris and Rita smiled over them. Sam and Isabella began talking as though they had known each other for years. As Chris and Rita listened it seemed as though the two were talking in their own language. The you know who, and that person, confused them.
"Hey squirt you're staying with us till you enroll on Monday." Isabella was about to protest but knew it would be useless. Especially when Sam was beside her begging her to go along with it.
They arrived at Lipshitz and as expected Fran hovered. She wanted to know if she was tired, hungry, comfortable, etc. Half an hour later, she asked again. Isabella found them all so adoring and completely fell in love with all of them. She could understand the loss that Chris felt when he almost lost them all.
Isabella hung out with Sam most of the morning till Chris pried the two away from each other so Isabella could get a chance to take a nap and rest from her flight. Taking her cousin's advice Isabella lay in bed and drifted off to sleep for about an hour. When she woke up she jumped in the shower. She found that everyone had dozed off too. The Lipshitz's door was closed, Sam and Chris we're sprawled on the living room couch asleep, and she assumed that Rita was in her room. Isabella let herself out of the back door. The beach was the first thing she noticed when she walked into the house. She walked slowly, lost in her thoughts. She sat against the rocks and stared out into the sea.
"I see you've found our special place." Isabella jumped. Surprised to see Rita standing before her.
"Hey I'm sorry if I worried you guys. I left a note."
"Hey, I'm not here to check on you…well okay maybe a little." Isabella smiled. Rita sat next to her, "Iz, I hope you don't take your cousin's over protectiveness the wrong way. He loves you a lot that's all." Isabella smiled.
"I know. The feeling is mutual. I don't mind it...much. I've always wanted an older brother and he's the best a person could ever ask for. It's just sometimes I think he forgets how old I am. Sometimes I think it was better when we weren't that close because at least then he saw me as a person, not as his baby cousin. Listen to me. I'm sorry. I don't mean to whine. I know it's only because he's looking out for me and I should be grateful and I am. Please don't think I'm not. It's just that as much as I love our relationship, I miss our being friends. We used to go for jogs together, play basketball, hang out, now as soon as I get here he's pulled the parent on me. He of all people knew that, that was the very thing I left because of. I just want to prove to them all that I can survive on my own. If they'd let me."
"Is that why you were so determined to go straight to the dorm?" Rita asked. She sympathized with her and she understood. Isabella gave a small nod.
"I didn't even want Chris to know till I was here already because I know how insistent he can be. Don't get me wrong. I love my parents to death, but a little bit of breathing space is just something I tend to look for."
"And when you come here your cousin, someone who used to get it turns out to be just like them?" Rita completed for her. Isabella gave a slight nod.
"A little. I mean I know it's only because he loves me and I am so grateful for that. I guess I just miss him."
"Well, I don't think there's much I can really offer you because your cousin tends to do that to me too and how old am I? And that wasn't a question for you to answer." Isabella grinned.
"As a wise woman just recently said. It's only because he loves you so much."
"Great, I thought it was bad enough to have Sam who chucks words I've used back at me the way Chris does, there's another one of you guys. Oh my." Isabella let out a laugh.
"Yeah well, I figured do what you do best. Rita, can I ask you something?"
Rita hesitated, not because she felt uncomfortable towards Isabella, on the contrary they blended quite well. She was just afraid that Isabella would punch the right note.
"You love my cousin don't you? You're in love with him aren't you?"
Isabella's boldness surprised both Isabella and Rita. The silence lingered for a moment. Then Rita gave her a slight nod.
"And we both know he loves you. What's stopping you from being together?"
"Scared I guess."
"Because the last time you guys gave truth a try it bombed?" Rita almost laughed out loud at the simplicity she generated.
"Yes that would be it."
"So you’re willing to spend the rest of your life cheating yourselves the happiness you both so want and deserve, just because you want to play it safe. Now don't get mad. I know I'm a naïve kid from Sydney, but one thing I know and I know well is my cousin. It may have taken years for us to find the link, but our kinship is strong. I lived through the years he lived without you, the happiness, the fear, the love, the loss. I know that he would give his life to take it all back and do it over, I know you are too. Now my question is, why when you have the chance, do both of you deny it?" Isabella left Rita speechless. Isabella was the only person who ever had the guts to call it like she saw it. Rita knew that she was right. Rita gave her a light nudge,
"You're pretty smart for a squirt. I think people should take you a little more seriously." Isabella grinned,
"Could you do me a favor and maybe convince my cousin I'm still Isabella, under squirt."
"I'll see what I can do. But like I said…"
"It's only because he loves me you" They said in unison. Rita and Isabella burst out laughing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Side by side Rita and Isabella walked back to the house. It seemed a bond had formed between them. Isabella was grateful that Rita saw her as Isabella, not as Chris's baby cousin. When they got there they found that everyone was still asleep so Rita accompanied Isabella in the guestroom.
"So what subjects are you planning on taking?" Rita asked as she flipped through the photos Isabella brought with her.
"I'm not sure. I think I'm swaying along the sides of English Lit more and more…the only thing is I did Australian English Lit, and I minored in American English Lit, meaning if I'm going to major in English Lit, it would have to be American Lit. I don't know. Communications still appeals to me, but who knows." Isabella realized that Rita was engrossed on a particular photo.
"What's captured you attention Miss Lance." Rita pointed to a photo of her and a friend taken on the beach back home.
"That's my best friend Paul. He and I met a few years back. We clicked from the very beginning. Stop grinning at me Rita, he's my best friend." Rita just kept on grinning. Without a word Isabella grabbed the nearest pillow and aimed. Shocked, it took Rita a moment before she retaliated. They collapsed into a heap a few minutes later, exhausted by their efforts. Isabella unpacked her lap top,
"Would the Lipshitz's mind if I hook up my computer and quickly check my e-mail?" Rita shook her head.
"Go for it. You want to be alone?" Isabella shook her head.
"No. Stay, this won't take long. I just want to send my parents a quick e-mail to say I'm here and safe. The sooner I do, the lesser chance I have of them calling so often." Rita laughed and sat beside her as she fiddled with her computer, typing a quick note to her parents. As she sent her e-mail, her server began to download her e-mails. Rita was taken aback by the amount of messages she was downloading.
"It's been a couple of days. And I just left." Isabella explained. Rita let out a fake cough as she noticed how many messages seemed to come from Paul.
"Not a word. Oh Cool Lisa e-mailed me." Isabella said out loud, she turned to Rita.
"She’s my friend from the net. We met by chance. You know one of those simple twists of fates."
"And she lives around here?"
"Close enough." Isabella answered with a shrug.
"Why don't you call them?" Rita suggested. Isabella shook her head firmly.
"I want to, but I want to settle in first. Besides I would like to spend my first couple of days with family. Whatever I say, no matter how suffocated I feel, I'm still a family oriented person. Back home I hung out with my cousins a lot, mostly my Dad's side of the family."
"That sounds great."
"Yeah in my Dad's side of the family there are 20 of us first cousins and our age ranges from late 30's for to early 20's. But fortunately for us, we all get along. We all hang out and go out with one another." Isabella looked wistful for a moment. It dawned on her how much she was going to miss their constant presence.
"Was it strained after your parents got separated?" Rita asked.
"Not really. It was weird, but we remained the same."
Chris knocked on the door. Rita glanced up and got up from the bed, and edged her way out of the room. Isabella looked at her curiously and realized that she was trying to give them some privacy.
"Hey squirt how about a jog." Isabella saw Rita cringe as he called her squirt. Isabella let out a small laugh and rolled her eyes up to the ceiling.
"Sure Chris. Give me a minute to get changed and I'll meet you downstairs." All in all Isabella didn't mind Chris's over protectiveness, she knew that it was something she was going to have to get used to. Sighing she packed up her laptop and headed for the bathroom to change in her shorts and joggers.
"I'm ready Chris." She called out as she bounded down the stairs, interrupting what seemed like an in depth conversation. Isabella stopped short and began to retreat,
"But I could have forgotten something upstairs. So I'll go back and check." Chris and Rita laughed.
"Get back down here. We're finished aren't we Sam?" Rita nodded,
"All done. Have a great run you guys. Hey Iz take it easy on your cousin. He's getting old and reached a fragile age." Chris's head spun to face Rita in disbelief. Isabella burst into hysterical laughter and ushered her cousin out the door.
"Come on Old man. Let's get some exercise into those brittle bones of yours." Rita gave Isabella a quick wink before she shut the door behind them. Rita watched them, they made quite a pair.
Their jog was almost silent. They concentrated on the jog and focused on their breathing. Though they were comfortable with each other, they were still trying to get used to being in each other's presence again. Chris led her to the same rock she sat on hours before with Rita.
"Hey Iz. I don't mean to crowd you. I'm sorry if I pulled a parent on you. I guess it's the Dad coming out of me. I mean it was easier to be just Chris before because I was still young and there was no Sam, now that I know I am responsible for another human being, it's hard to step out of the mode. Especially since I know how different it is here, than it is there." Isabella looked over at her cousin and gave him a slight nudge.
"I don't mind that you're over protective. I love it I do. But I just need you to have the same faith you had in me that I'll survive. At the moment as much as I love you for looking out for me, I miss my friend. The one who encouraged me to be fearless, to go after my dreams at all cost." Chris took hold of his cousin's hand
"Is that what you think. That I've lost faith in your ability? Quite the contrary Iz, I see the fire within you burning so brightly that I'm scared of the repercussions. Having Samantha to consider all the time has I guess made the fine lines blur a bit, because to her I am only a parent. You and I started out as buds…."
"I know. I miss that."
"Just be patient with me cous, I just want what's best for you."
"Hey Chris I know that. And you don't need to apologize. I feel kinda whiny that I feel this way, but we were always honest right. Maybe from time to time you could let the bud in you come out more often. Because that's what I need Chris. I need a friend to talk to, not a parent. If I wanted to be pampered and doted on, I would have just stayed back home." Chris threw an arm around her,
"I'll do my best kid." Isabella leaned her head on her cousin's shoulder.
"Thanks Chris. I've missed you." Chris placed a kiss on his cousin's forehead.
"Me too Squirt. Me too." Isabella poked Chris's knee repeatedly as she began,"I talked to Rita earlier."
"And…" he asked curiously,
"I think you're both wasting time. You love each other and you're denying the happiness you could be sharing." Chris pulled back and looked at his cousin in disbelief. He had almost forgotten how bold she was. She had only been there hours,
"What? Don't look at me like that. You know as well as I do that I'm right. So my question is. What are you going to do about it?"
"I'm working on it kid."
"You do that cousin. After all, you aren't getting any younger." She added. Chris's hold on her tightened as his hands made his way around her to tickle her unmercifully. Isabella leapt to her feet and began to run back to the Lipshitz household, with Chris lagging behind. They returned they were both breathless, from the jog and laughter. Sam was sitting on the kitchen bench when they arrived. Chris drooped an arm around his daughter.
"Oh baby you're Daddy's getting old."
"Getting? Dad you've been there awhile" Sam responded with a triumphant smile. Isabella held up her hand and high fived with Sam. Rita watched them smiling, while Chris looked over at Rita with pleading eyes to rescue him.
"You're on your own partner. I'm with them."
"Face it Chris. You are out numbered by 3 intelligent women. You and your caveman ways have been put pasture." Isabella fired. Chris shook his head as he laughed,
"Ooh, you're going to get it little girl." Isabella jumped behind Rita who instinctively blocked her protectively, Sam pulled her tongue out at him and comfortably draped an arm around Rita.
"Oh Iz before I forget your parents called and said they'll call back tonight." Sam rolled her eyes.
"I told you didn't I?" Rita laughed. Just before Chris could say anything the phone rang once more.
"Hello." Rita answered.
"May I know who's calling please?" They watched as a smile crept across Rita's face.
"Sure hold on one sec. Uh IZ, for you…" The grin on Rita's face unnerved Isabella, but as soon as she heard the voice, she laughed.
"Hey Po. How'd you know where to find me?" Isabella watched Chris's face scrunch up into disapproval, while Sam and Rita's were full of smiles.
"I called your Mom and she told me that you were staying there for the weekend. Did you get in okay. You okay?"
"Oh. Yeah I got in okay. Yes, Chris is taking care of me. You know between the two of you I'm the most looked out person in the world?"
"It's only because we care." he said reassuringly.
"Yeah I know. How are things there?"
"Fine. A little strange without you, but…"
"You'll get over it." Paul laughed.
"Well, I'll try my best not to, how's that?"
"You better. You better go. This is costing you a fortune. I'll just e-mail you back. Take care."
"You too, especially you. I miss you Biks."
"I'm glad." Isabella turned her back for a moment,
"I miss you too." She murmured. Rita and Sam broke into a grin, while Chris stood there waiting for an explanation.
"Alright. See Ya. Loves ya."
"Me too." With that Isabella put the phone down and looked at them as though nothing happened.
"Well guys I think I'll hop into that shower again." Just as she was about to step up the stairs,
"No you don't….get your cute little butt back here." Sam was laughing hysterically while Rita just looked at her sympathetically.
"Who was that?" Chris inquired.
"My best friend Paul. No he's not my boyfriend. He's my best friend. You met. Though at the time we hardly hung out, but these last months while you've been gone, we’ve hung out. He reminds me of you. you both have that annoying habit of being soooo protective. Speaking of which, I told we were laying off that a little." Chris leaned closer and threw an arm around her shoulder.
"Just screening Iz. Protective huh? I like the guy already." Isabella rolled her eyes and headed up the stairs to shower, Sam following close behind for a blow by blow of their conversation. Sam knew about Paul, and she even go the chance to chat with him whenever she chatted with Isabella.
"That kid is going to be the death of me." Chris said out loud.
"Which one?" Rita asked, knowing which he had in mind.
"Well I'm hoping that I won't have to worry about Sam for at least another couple of years. I'm hoping two decades actually."
"I'd hate to break this to you Partner, but you're going to be disappointed on both accounts. They are both going to grow up and quickly. It's in their generation."
"They make me feel old Sam." He confided.
"Chris you're 40 years old. You're not exactly ancient."
"Next to them I am."
"No you're not. Maybe a little to Sam because you're her father but not Isabella, if you feel old around her, it's your own doing. Stop being her parent and be what you once were. Her cousin, who loves her dearly, who occasionally worries about her, the friend that she confided in all those what seven years you were there."
"You're right. But it's just hard not to, I've been practicing with Sam that it's hard to step out of the mode. With having Sam I realize what it took for her parents to let her come here, because of me, and if anything ever happened to her."
"Chris you were bound to feel that whether or not you have Sam, the only difference is now you're finding it hard to distinguish the difference between your daughter and your cousin who is an adult. She's not 12 Chris. If her parents let her come here, then the least you could do is let her live out her life the way she set out to. She's bound to make mistakes and she should. When she does remember you're not her father, you're her cousin and all she asks is for your love and guidance." Chris got up from where he sat and walked behind her to wrap his arms around her.
"I've missed you Sam" he whispered. Though things were slowly getting back to normal, it was still a little hard to forget all that's happened. They had regained their friendship but they both realized that there were boundaries where there once weren't.
"Me too." Rita whispered as she laced her fingers with his around her waist.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Your parents are looking better." Isabella commented as Sam went through her laptop.
"Yeah, Gramps, Gramma and I have bets on how long it would take." Isabella glanced up in surprise.
"What? Are you going to tell me you're not interested in putting in a wager?"
"Of course not…well maybe…" Isabella said sheepishly.
"They've been good ever since they finally told each other the truth."
"You seem okay about it all." Isabella observed.
"Oh don't get me wrong. I was angry at first, but then I realized that it was all circumstances in the end. Dad never knew about me and all the other stuff. Besides, as I told him, it wasn't as though I never had a father. Or a male figure, Papa was there. Even though I knew he was gay, he was my father for the longest time and in a lot of ways, he will always be." Isabella walked over to her and placed a kiss on top of her head.
"Your parents should take lessons from you." Sam grinned knowing exactly what she meant.
"Hey Sam I saw a mall within walking distance, do you think your parents would let us watch a movie on our own tonight?"
"After the afternoon you just spent with my father, how could you even ask that question. We have a couple of choices. 1.) They drive us there and God Forbid come along with us. 2.) Get Dad to drive us to the video store, where they'll come anyway, grab a few movies and watch it here, where I once again warn you that they’ll watch with us." Isabella laughed. She guessed as much, but it was a thought. She wanted to spend time with Sam one on one before going to the dorm.
"Well I don't know, you gave me so many choices." Isabella teased sarcastically.
"How about number 2, and tomorrow before your parents get up we'll go for a jog and when I get back, I'll go again with your Dad."
"Sounds great."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Fran prepared a grand meal in honor of Isabella's arrival. They sat around the table talking. Chris and Isabella’s reminisced about their time together, travelling and hanging out.
"Remember that time you refused to get on that ride? What was it called the River Rampage?" Chris teased. Isabella blushed as she remembered the dreaded height of the ride. A ride, that took you so many stories high and drops you, as you plummet down you get drenched by water.
"That was a low blow cousin." Fran, Harry, Rita and Sam watched the playful exchange between the two cousins. Chris looked so happy.
"Isabella, there's something Harry and I wanted to talk to you about." Fran said interrupting politely. Isabella looked up and smiled up at them both.
"Sure Mrs, um, Grams." Sam smiled at her encouragingly.
"Well, I know you want to be independent and want to enjoy your adulthood and everything. Harry and I just wanted you to know that we would like you to come home on weekends if you want to that is. We just think it would be nice. I mean, you are part of the family." Isabella was quiet for a moment, caught totally off guard.
"Thank you. That means a lot."
"So kid was that a yes?" Chris pushed. Rita gave him a soft slap on the arm. Sam looked at her anxiously as the Lipshitz just smiled.
"How about every other weekend. It's not that I don't want to. I do. I can imagine how much I would miss you all, it's just that…" Isabella tried to find the words but couldn't quite find it. Rita got reached over and gave her hand a squeeze,
"That's okay Isabella. We understand. We just wanted you to know that you have a place to come home to, if ever you want to." Isabella threw Rita a grateful look,
"Thank you anyway. I promise you, next weekend I will be home."
"That's good enough." Fran stated giving her shoulder a gentle squeeze as she walked past headed for the kitchen. Isabella could see the disappointment in Chris's face, she was sorry that she couldn't oblige, knowing it was what he would have liked, but she had to do what she had set out to do. She made a mental note to talk to him before she went to bed. Isabella got up from her chair and started clearing the dishes.
"Uh no you don't young lady." Fran said as she walked back in with the desserts on a tray.
"Hey if I'm a part of this family I pull my weight. Which means I wash the dishes. You can ask Chris. I'm an expert." Chris smiled broadly.
"That she is."
Fran sighed, but relented in the end, knowing that Isabella had her. Chris rose from his chair too and began clearing up. Rita raised her eyebrow, which did not go unnoticed by Chris.
"Not a word Lance."
"What? Me?" she said innocently.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Isabella passed a plate to Chris who seemed lost in his thoughts.
"Earth to Christopher" Isabella teased. Chris smiled at her sheepishly and kept drying. Isabella put down the wet dish, and grabbed the towel from Chris.
"I talk. You listen." Surprised Chris obliged.
"I know you're disappointed, and maybe even a little mad that I turned down the Lipshitz's offer. But cous, this is your family. As much as they're making it hard for me to think of them as anything less than my own. They're not. They're yours. You all have to work on your family together and whatever part I play in that has to be minimal. Aside from that. I need to know that I can survive on my own. That just because you're just 10 minutes away doesn't mean I will be running to you for every dilemma or problem I have. And I know you want me to. But how am I supposed to learn anything for myself, if you're not going to let me. Come on Chris. I traveled across the earth by myself, now that I get here you want me to go back to thumb sucking?" Isabella shook her head, disappointed that he didn't seem to understand her anymore. It seemed that they were worlds apart now and that now that they were in the same country. They had never been so far apart. The thought saddened Isabella. Isabella washed the last dish and handed the plate to Chris. Without a word she left him in the kitchen by himself.
Rita saw Isabella head on upstairs without a word closing the bedroom door behind her. She glanced between the kitchen and the bedroom, not quite sure where to go first.
"Chris?" Chris turned his face to face Rita, startled.
"Hey Sam."
"I thought you were giving the whole idea of space a try?"
"I can't help it. I just want to make sure that she's okay. I just want her around more often. Is that a crime?"
"Not if its because you want to be with her. If that's what it is and not you worrying that she won't make it out into this cruel world, because I gotta tell you Partner, if that was me, I wouldn't want to be with you often either." Rita's words hit him like a ton of bricks. She placed a soft kiss on his cheek before leaving him with his thoughts. He knew that she had a point.
Rita looked around Isabella's room and found her to be no where in sight. She was about to check the backyard when she noticed that the window was open. Rita found Isabella sitting on the roof leaning against wall next to the window. Rita climbed out of the window and sat on the window ledge.
"You up for company?" Isabella sighed and nodded.
"He's not making this easy Rita." Isabella whispered.
"Maybe it was a bad idea that I headed for Palm Beach. I mean all I'm doing is causing friction between us and that was the last thing I imagined would happen between us. Maybe I should have just convinced my parents to let me go to New York or something. I'm sure if I kept prying they would've caved in. Let me tell you a little secret. I came to Palm Beach mainly because I wanted to hang out with my cousin Christopher. Yes my parents relented a lot quicker because Chris was around, but the decision was mine to be at Palm Beach. Not theirs."
"You love him an awful lot don't you?"
"Are you kidding. He's like a brother to me. As close as I am to my other cousins, no one was like Chris. We hung out, we looked out for each other. We trusted each other completely. He was my best friend. We could talk about anything, and I knew that whatever happened, I could always turn to him."
"You still can." Rita said soothingly,
"As what his kid naïve cousin who's so dense that she might harm herself at any given moment, or as the cousin/friend we once were to each other." Isabella said interrupting. She had Rita speechless. It was the very same question she asked Chris minutes before in the kitchen.
"If you could have seen what it was like before you'll understand why I find this so upsetting. Rita he and I used to talk, about anything and everything. Yes even his gruesome stories about women. He trusted in me as I did of him. When he was in Sydney he was the one who pushed me to be whoever I wanted to be regardless whether or not my parents kept a tight leash on me. He was the one who taught me to fight for what I believe in and if I really wanted to make it in the real world, then I had to stand up to my parents and fight for what I really want. And now that I have and my parents have loosened the leash, the one person whom I thought would finally set the leash free, is the very person who's taken the leash and tied it around a pole, and he expects me to take it? After he was the person who gave me my first taste of freedom."
Rita wrapped an arm around her, unable to say anything. Chris stood by her doorway. He had heard everything she had said. He felt terrible. Just as Rita was climbing back in to give Isabella privacy she caught sight of Chris. Chris leaned against the doorway,
"Leave her be for a little while. Give her a chance to calm down a little. She's still a little angry." Rita whispered. Chris nodded and followed her out, closing the door behind him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Isabella woke up at five in the morning. She threw the sheets off and got changed into her shorts. She was going to wake Sam to go jogging with her but decided against it. They had stayed up most of the night talking in her room. Isabella placed a kiss on her Sam's head before she slipped out of Sam's room where she fell asleep beside her. She left a note for Sam telling her that she will be back when she woke up and they could jog then, and another one for everyone else telling them that she was out jogging, that she'd be careful and be back shortly. Isabella closed the back door quietly and broke into a light run before pushing herself to go faster, trying her very best to exhaust herself, burning off the excess energy that lingered. She was still angry at Chris, angry like she'd never been before. It hurt her to think that so much had changed between them, she came from his eternal confidant to Squirt, a naïve kid who can't be trusted to take care of herself, Isabella let out an angry groan and kept running. When she made it to the other end she considered turning back but remembered that she had thrown her swimmers on, she threw her shirt and shorts off and dove into the water, enjoying the refreshing coldness that touched her whole body. She was surprised that the temperature of the water didn't rise just by her presence, believing that her anger could probably boil water.
Chris watched her from the Lipshitz veranda. He had heard her slip out of the house. He considered going for a run with her, but as soon as she started running he could see from her perseverance that she was angry and trying to release it. He watched her run hard and throw herself into the water.
"Are you going to stand there and watch her forever?" Rita called out from the doorway. Startled Chris jumped, he gave her a soft smile.
"I think it's safer here than over there at the moment. I blew it didn't I Sam?" Rita walked over beside him.
"No I don't think you have Chris. She loves you a lot. She's just a lot hurt that the person she expected to always be there for her, wasn't."
"But I am." He protested.
"No you're not and you know it. You're treating her like a child and she isn't. Like I said, she isn't Sam and she isn't 12. You need to remember that." Chris sighed, he knew that he was wrong, but he didn't know how he could fix it. They watched Isabella get out of the water and shake herself dry before putting her clothes back on. Instead of turning back Isabella walked over the rocks and sat watching the waves. "She's so much like you Chris. Look at her. Instead of lashing out when she's angry she retreats into her own corner. What do want to bet that when she comes back she'll pretend as though nothing's happened."
"But deep down I know for a fact that she will never look at me the same."
"See, you know because that's what you would do. Now put yourself in her shoes. If you came all this way to be with a cousin you missed so much, certain that he would be the same when you got here, only to find out that he wasn't. What's worse he treated you as though you were an incapable twelve year old, how angry would you be?"
"I'd be furious."
"Hold on to that thought Partner. Hold that thought."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Isabella realized that she had been gone for than an hour and decided to run back. She wasn't looking forward to coming face to face with Chris. When she got there she saw that he was up and sitting on the veranda with Rita. Isabella bent over and gave Rita a kiss on the cheek good morning, and placed a hesitant one on Chris's before mumbling something about a run with Sam. Chris watched her run up the stairs to his daughter's room. Rita gave him a sympathetic glance before rising to her feet, she was almost inside the door when she turned back and kissed the top of his head.
"You gotta let her go Chris, while you still have her."
Isabella closed the door to Sam's bedroom and headed for her own, contemplating whether or not she should shower first or go down to breakfast. Still hiding from Chris Isabella sat on her bed and unpacked the lap top to download her e-mail. As she was downloading she was surprised but happy to see her friend Lisa online.
"Hey IZ, you're up early? Or haven't you even been to bed yet?"
Isabella bit her lower lip and smiled.
"What makes you think that?" Isabella responded,
"Because I know you remember. May I remind you that if you hadn't yet slept, you really should because you're jet lagged."
"That's a fallacy" Isabella commented.
"Yeah right. So how's it been? Let me guess you stayed up all night with your cousin Chris talking and reminiscing about old times?" Lisa noticed that Isabella paused and did not answer.
"IZ…" Isabella sighed,
"Let's just say I was up all night, but it wasn't that."
"What happened?"
"I don't want to talk about it. I'll just e-mail it to you."
"You want to talk? We're in the same country now you know. What's the number there?" Isabella hesitated, but she could use the friend and told her the number. The phone rang, Isabella could hear the footsteps headed her way. She crossed her fingers hoping it wasn't Chris. She almost sighed with relief when she saw Rita standing outside her door.
"Did it wake anyone?" Isabella asked worried. Rita just gave her a small smile,
"No, don't worry so much Isabella. This is now your home as much as anyone else's. You heard Frannie last night." She thanked Rita, wanting to tell her that she certainly didn't feel it. She took the phone from her hand and closed the door behind Rita's retreating figure.
"What's up buttercup?" Isabella laughed at Lisa's attempt of humor.
"Hey you. So this is what you sound like huh?"
"Can I pass as Leslie…" Lisa asked with her bedroom voice. Isabella burst out laughing picking up on the secret joke.
"Definitely my friend. Definitely."
Lisa and Isabella talked for a little while, but it didn't seem appropriate to talk about her dilemma. So after half an hour, Isabella and Lisa said their goodbye's and vowed to call each other soon.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"So what happened to your jog with Sam." Rita asked as she placed a stack of pancakes in front of Isabella.
"It went out the window when she dozed of at 3 this morning. We kinda got talking and one thing led to another, we forgot what time it was."
"Yeah, I could hear the giggles from where I was." Isabella looked up and began to apologize,
"Sorry Rita. I didn't mean to keep you awake too." She felt extremely apologetic.
"Don't be silly. It's so nice that you and Sam get along so well. She's been searching for a relative around her age, and it's nice to see that she found one."
"Thanks Rita."
"You're welcome. Are you ready to talk?" She asked. Isabella shook her head, knowing what Rita meant.
"Not yet. I don't want to say something I'll regret. For now, I just want to leave it." Rita looked as though she disapproved,
"Ree, what can he tell me that he hasn't already?"
"Give him a chance Iz…"
"I am…for now it's a little hard to get past it." Isabella finished her breakfast and brought her dishes to the sink.
"I think I'll go and grab a shower before Sam wakes up. For what it's worth Rita. I know what you're trying to say." Rita nodded and gave her a sympathetic smile.
Instead of grabbing a shower Isabella crawled out the window and sat where she sat the previous night. As badly as she wanted to shower, she felt as though she needed the fresh air. How she wished she could talk to Paul at that moment, he always found the right words to say and gave her the most inconceivable scenarios that it made her laugh and forget for a little while. At that very moment she felt homesick. Isabella was startled when she realized that Chris had sat down beside her. Isabella looked the other way unable to say anything. Chris shifted himself uncomfortably.
"Iz, I don't even know where to start." He whispered. Isabella remained silent not offering any sign of encouragement.
"I'm sorry."
"Why Chris because I got mad? If I didn't get mad and Rita didn't tell you, would you have known why? Would you have known why it annoyed me so much?"
"Uh Iz. I just stepped into the shoes of fatherhood and I am not that great at it, but I'm working on it. But it's my most constant role in life. I'm sorry if it seemed as though I didn't trust you enough with your own life. That wasn't it at all. I just worry about you that's all."
"I get that part Chris, that's not what gets me mad. What gets me mad is that you would rather have me here at the Lipshitz's so you could make sure than I'm okay….which is nice and all if you were my Uncle. I just have a totally different picture of my cousin that's all, because if I remember correctly, the cousin that existed in the seven years back home would have liked me to stay around here to be with me and nothing more."
"Oh squirt, I do want you here." Isabella didn't respond. Chris knew that she didn't believe him. That the hurt had passed a certain point and the damage was done.
"Maybe I should have just stayed back home. At least then…" Isabella sighed. Chris's head turned to face her. Isabella's face was solemn and full of hurt and disappointment. Not knowing what else to do Chris pulled her in his arms and held her tightly. For the first time since she had arrived it felt as though Chris her cousin was hugging her. Lis buried her face into his chest as the tears began to slide down her cheeks. Chris kissed the top of her head repeatedly as he apologized to her. A few minutes later they could hear Sam make her way down to breakfast.
"You coming with me?" he asked hopefully. Isabella shook her head.
"I think I'll go and take a shower, then pack. So tomorrow we could leave early in the morning." Chris nodded without protesting. He kissed the side of her head once more before climbing back into the house. Chris walked into the kitchen and placed a kiss on his daughters head before swiping a pancake of her plate.
Dad…" she whined. Chris flashed her the famous Lorenzo grin. Rita watched them with a smile on her face. They had become a family, even through circumstances.
"Where's Iz?" Sam asked.
"Upstairs, packing and getting ready to shower." Rita picked up on the packing and gave him a questioning look that was answered with a shrug. This exchange did not go unnoticed by Fran and Harry. A few minutes later Harry excused himself.
He knocked on the door and received no answer, when he popped his head in he saw hat Isabella was no where in sight, he smiled when he saw the window was open. That too was his favorite place in the whole house. It overlooked the ocean and from where she sat she could see the horizon. Isabella was still talking herself into a shower when Harry interrupted her thoughts.
"I see you have found my secret place." Isabella grinned.
"I seem to be finding everyone else's hiding places. Here I was thinking that I was finding all these really cool places." Harry sat beside her.
"Don't worry, I'm willing to share with you. Your secret's safe with me." He said reassuringly giving her a wink.
"Thank you so much for making me a part of your family so unconditionally."
"Hey that's okay. You're Chris's family and by technicality and you have no choice about it, you're ours now too, and I couldn't be happier. Frannie and I have always wanted kids and were never able to have any, now with all of you guys here. It's nice. With you in the house I feel like I have another granddaughter. Thank you." Isabella's eyes began to fill with tears as she listened to him.
"You know you would be my very first grandfather. I've never had one. Both of mine died when I was really young. I would be honored to be your grand daughter." Harry smiled and threw an arm around her giving her a firm squeeze.
"Now that I am officially your grand father, you want to tell Gramps what's got ya so bummed that you've been sitting here for ages?"
Isabella looked up shocked. She gave him slight shrug of a shoulder before breathing deeply,
"Aside from your sometimes bonehead of a cousin?" Isabella burst out laughing in spite of her mood.
"It's not really him…well yeah. I just feel a little frustrated. Coming all this way with high expectations I guess. I guess I just expected everything to be the way they were when he was overseas with me…but it's so far from what it was. Here he's acting like my father. I don't mind it, but I just wish I had my cousin back. The one that was my friend if nothing more, but it's hard to explain. I miss the guy I spent endless night staying up talking to. The mischievous guy who always got us in trouble, but without fail always smiled his way out of it for both of us. Is it so wrong to long for what it once was? I mean Gramps. That's all I ever knew of him. And that's what I was counting on, and now to feels as though there's no point in my decision of coming to Palm Beach at all." Chris tapped Harry on the shoulder, he was on his way to the shower when he couldn't help overhear what she was saying. Harry turned around,
"May I?" he asked solemnly. Harry looked at Isabella who just shrugged her shoulders. Harry gave her head a quick kiss on the side and crawled back in while Chris crawled out.
"So, how do I dig myself out of this one? I don't suppose one of my smiles would work right about now?" Isabella didn't even flinch. "Come on Buttons, you gotta forgive your bonehead of a cousin. At least this time." Isabella couldn't help but smile as she heard him call her Buttons. She wasn't quite sure when it began but he was always teasing her about her nose, one day buttons was born.
"No fair, you're using sentimentality as a tool." Isabella replied trying her best to stay mad at him. But it was too late. Chris could already see the smile in the corner of her mouth.
"Come on, you know you want to. Look I promise, the next time I begin my bonehead activity, you can throw a punch without a word."
"Ooh, now that's too good of an opportunity to pass up. All right, but I'm warning you I will not hesitate you use that." Chris broke into a huge grin pulled her towards him, engulfing him into his arms for a famous Lorenzo hug.
"Iz…" Rita called out from downstairs just as she got out of the bathroom.
"Yeah Ree…" she replied drying her hair with a towel as she walked down to where Rita stood at the bottom of the stairs.
"We've been abandoned. They went grocery shopping, considering that your cousin, Harry and Sam are with Fran. It's a pretty safe bet that they won't be home for a fair while. You up for watching a video with me?" Isabella grinned.
"You bet."
Within minutes they were sprawled on the couch with a huge bowl of popcorn between them engrossed in an old time sap classic, An affair to remember.
Ree, don't take this the wrong way, but man you’re such a Sap."
Isabella teased. Rita looked shocked at the dig and responded by throwing a pillow in Isabella's direction.
"That's fresh coming from someone who's been sighing every 5 minutes" she fired back. Isabella stuck a tongue out at her.
"Yes, well that's something we all wish we could have. You already have it, you're just not willing to see it."
"It's not that simple Iz." Rita said quietly. Isabella placed a hand over Rita's and gave it a gentle squeeze.
"Hey I know that. I know the risks that you're scared of but you shouldn't be. You and Chris aren't young anymore. Chris isn't exactly the playboy he once was, and speaking as somebody that has spent the last 7 to 8 years with him, after Jillian, there was no one else. Our cousins and some of our friends used to hassle him because he lived like a priest. He would come out with all of us, under protest. And on those times it was me he was always with. Let me tell you, no one else had their arm around me while he was around because he would already have his." Rita smiled. It seemed so unlike Chris but it was a comfort.
"What about you and Paul?" Rita asked slyly, wanting to draw the attention away from the truth that Iasbella was making her face.
Isabella's face scrunched up knowing exactly what Rita was implying.
"Po…he's my best friend. That's all."
"Hmm, that sounds familiar."
"Is that a challenge? You're asking for a pillow fight aren't you?"
Isabella teased arming herself with a cushion.
"You're on little girl." Rita answered grabbing the nearest cushion and began retaliation. Chris, Fran, Harry and Sam walked in on their war just as Isabella threw a pillow aiming at Rita who ducked, therefore the pillow hit Chris squarely on the face.
"Ooops" Isabella said beginning to giggle while Chris strode towards her. Isabella leapt up on the couch and ran as fast as she could behind Fran who guarded her protectively.
"Not fair cousin. You can't use grandparents as human shield." As a response Isabella stuck her tongue out at him and wrapped her arms around Fran's shoulders. Chris shook his head and figured out a consolation. He grabbed a pillow and threw it at Rita who didn't expect it that the pillow came in contact with her head. Once again erupting another pillow fight, this time between Rita and Chris who both ended up on the floor together, Chris pinning her down, a look passed between them that was not missed by all those present. Awkwardly Chris got up and held a hand out to Rita, who took it shyly as she straightened herself up.
"So what's for lunch?" Rita asked casually. Isabella stifled a giggle, receiving a warning look from both Rita and Chris. Fran and Harry smiled, while Sam gave her a thumbs up.
"Well Chris suggested a barbecue. He volunteered to make his famous burgers in honor of Isabella." Fran answered,
"So what's the plans this afternoon?" Rita asked.
"I have my Piano lesson and as much as I'd love to miss it, I know you guys won't let me considering Mr. Manning goes on his vacation next week." Rita and Chris nodded in agreement.
"Well, we'll take the munchkin to her lesson and stroll around while we wait for her to finish. That leaves you guys, what do you guys plan on doing?" Harry asked. Chris looked over at Isabella. Rita spoke up,
"Well I have a few errands to run, I won't be gone for very long so that leaves you two." Isabella felt as though she was being set up but ignored it.
"What do you say Isabella, think you're up to an afternoon with me?" Chris asked grinning.
"I'm sure I candle handle it. After all Christopher I had to endure you for about eight years on my own, and after you left Charlie let me take care of his puppy….so you could say yep, I'm ready." Isabella answered cutely. While the rest burst into hysterical laughter, Chris threw a napkin at Isabella. Straight after lunch everyone left promising to return as soon as possible.
"So Buttons, are we really okay?" Chris asked hesitantly as they washed the dishes side by side. Isabella paused and looked over at her cousin and gave him a slight nod.
"Yeah Chris, we're cool. Just promise to at least try and lay off the parent thing." Chris grinned.
"I'll do my very best."
When Rita got back to the house she found Chris and Isabella had parked themselves in front of the TV in the Den. Isabella was lying with her back against Chris’s chest as they verbally abused some show on TV. Rita watched them amused. She left quietly not wanting to disturb them.
“Now Iz, remember if you need anything you call okay?” Chris repeated to what seemed like a millionth time to Isabella. Though she no longer got mad, Chris had mellowed dramatically and Isabella could tell what an effort it was for him to let her go. Isabella nodded smiling. She glanced at Rita who was laughing at them and rolled her eyes.
“Okay, later you guys. I’ll call you. Thanks for taking me. See ya.” She said giving them each a hug goodbye, ushering them to finally go. Just as she thought she got them out, Chris turned around and grabbed her and hugged her fiercely once more.
“You take care of yourself Iz. I love you.” Touched Isabella could feel the tears well up in her eyes and was almost tempted to let them stay a little longer.
“I love you too Chris. Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine. I promise I’ll call you if I need you. Besides I’ll be home every other weekend.
I’ll be okay.”
After a few more minutes he was finally out of there. Isabella sighed with relief. She loved her cousin to death but he was getting a bit too much. Weeks, months passed and Isabella felt more and more at home. At Palm Beach and especially the Lipshitzs household. Gradually her weekends were spent at the Lipshitz household, except for the rare occasions that something would come up and she’d have to stay in her dorm. Chris had learned not to hold on to her so tightly and Isabella thrived because of it. In the months that passed she and Chris became even more closer than before.
“IZ!!!” a yell echoed through the house. Isabella looked up from her books, surprised.
“Phone for you. It’s Paul.” Without another thought Isabella grabbed the phone she was too absorbed to hear.
“Thanks Chris” she yelled back before speaking into the receiver.
“Hey you.” She greeted him excitedly. It had been months since her arrival. Months since she had to say goodbye to him. As much as she loved Palm Beach, Chris, Rita, Sam and the Lipshitz’s. She missed Paul. Paul was her best friend. The one person who probably knew what she was thinking with just one look, or a word with a strain. He knew it all. Isabella sighed at the thought of missing him.
“Hey Izzybear. Miss me?” Isabella laughed. He always called her Izzybear. It was a cute endearment but also embarrassing.
“What kind of a question is that?” she replied amused.
“Just making sure. A guy needs constant reassurances you know?” At that Isabella had to laugh. Aside from momentary lapses Paul was one of the most confident people she knew.
“Well if that’s the case, let me give this a try…” Isabella made a point of clearing her throat,
“Aww Po…I’ve missed you and I don’t know how I survive on the daily basis without you.” She drawled sweetly.
“If only you meant it Iz.” He chuckled. Isabella broke into a huge grin.
“So Po, what’s up? I thought we promised each other no impulsive calls for awhile after we both got our phone bills.” She said trying to be stern, but inwardly pleased to hear his voice again, and James knew it.
“I got your letter about twenty minutes ago. I just wanted to hear your voice and make sure you’re okay.” Isabella let out another sigh. She knew she shouldn’t have told him, she should have known he’d overreact, but at the time it didn’t seem like a big deal.
“Yeah, I’m okay PO. Really!”
“Have you seen a Doctor? Got yourself checked out at least?” He asked, She had worried him about her constant headaches and a couple of blackouts that she had.
“It was a one off thing Po. I’m okay really. I’m just stressed with exams and everything, but I’m okay.” She tried to reassure him, at the same time cursing herself for telling him. She hadn’t meant to, she was just telling him about her volleyball game and it happened there.
“Have you at least told Chris or Rita, or even the Lipshitz’s” Though he already knew the answer, her silence on the other end confirmed it for him. James let out a huge breath,
“Izzy bear.”
“Look I’m okay. Really. If it continues I’ll go I’ll see a doctor about it myself. I don’t want them to worry. I just want to finish with my exams first. Okay?” Knowing that was the best answer she was going to get, he agreed.
“PROMISE?” Isabella closed her eyes and waited before answering.
“I promise PO.” Almost satisfied Paul changed the subject.
“So any new drama’s I should know about?” he teased referring to her current special friend. Isabella laughed.
“Haha Po.”
“Give the guy a break Iz, say yes already.” He teased.
“Like I have the time to fully commit myself into a relationship. Or patience” she replied dryly. They continued their comical conversation for a little while longer before saying goodbye.
“You better go Po.”
“Yeah I better. Listen, you take care of yourself okay and remember your promise.”
“You too and I will.”
“I miss you Izzy bear.”
“I miss you too. Love you Po.”
“Love you back Iz.” Isabella smiled as she hung up the phone. She walked back to the kitchen and returned to her seat and tried to her back into her studying, but her mind kept wandering and pounding. Chris walked in to find her with her head resting on her books with her eyes closed.
“Hey Buttons. You could always try it intravenously. Trust me I tried sleeping on my books too and it never worked.” Isabella opened her eyes and smiled without lifting her head.
“I may have to try that.”
Loosen up kid. You’re home for the weekend. RELAX.”
“MIDTERMS Chris.” She said exasperatedly. Chris grinned and threw an arm around her.
“You’ll be okay.” He said reassuringly, planting a kiss on the side of her head.
“Thanks for the vote of confidence. Where’s the rest of the crew?” she asked. She came home just before lunch after her morning class and Chris was the only one home.
“Well Sam’s still at school, she has basketball practice straight after. Fran and Rita went grocery shopping. Harry’s gone fishing with an old buddy from the force.”
“Uncle Harry? Gramps? Allergic to everything Lipshitz, fishing?” Chris laughed. Isabella had definitely gotten to know everyone in the family and fit in like a glove. Chris had the very same reaction when Fran had announced it.
“What do you say kid, Ice cream?” Isabella lifted her head to look at him and grinned. Chris grabbed the litre of Cookies and Cream Ice Cream and picked up two spoons.
“The beach?” He said suggestively. Isabella jumped from the chair and opened the back door as Chris led the way to their favourite spot. After sitting down Chris handed Isabella a spoon.
“Thanks.”
“So how was your week Buttons?” he asked while spooning a generous helping of Ice Cream into his mouth. Isabella shook her head at him in amusement.
“It was ok. Not much happened. The only thing I’ve been seeing these past couple of weeks is the inside of my room at the dorm, that, the library, classrooms, dorm…” Chris could feel that she was evading something but knew better than to pry and ask. He knew in time he would tell her, that or he’ll drag it out of her somehow in the most subtle way. He made a mental note to ask Rita about how he could go about being subtle.
“How are you and Rita doing?” she asked. Though she spoke with them frequently throughout the week, there was never enough time to elaborate.
“Um, okay I guess. I mean for the moment we’re working on the whole friendship thing. I mean the bond and chemistry is still there and oozes quite naturally, but with everything that has happened, it makes things a little more difficult.” Isabella leaned against him and rested her head on his shoulder.
“Give her time cousin. I know it must be frustrating at times because you love her so much, but you can’t rush these things. More importantly you can’t rush her.” Chris kissed the top of her head appreciatively.
“How’d you become so smart?” Isabella looked up and smiled.
“I have a good teacher.” A long pause passed before Isabella continued
“Thank Rita for me.” Without another word Isabella jumped up and began to run back to the house, with Chris following close behind after her vowing revenge. Isabella burst into the kitchen laughing, as she looked up she saw Fran and Rita unpacking the groceries. Realizing Chris had caught up Isabella took a huge step towards Fran and hugged her.
“Hey Grams. How was the grocery shopping?” By the time Chris entered, Isabella was safe in Fran’s arms. Rita knew what was going on and had to let out a laugh. Chris shook his head defeated knowing revenge had to be put on hold for the moment.
How’s my angel?” Fran asked affectionately. Isabella tightened her arms around her. Fran and Harry had become the Grandparents she never had and grew to love them dearly.
“Fine Grams. Busy studying.” Noticing that she had left her books on the counter, she walked over and began to shove them back into her back pack. After she was done she walked over to Rita and placed a kiss on her cheek.
“Hey you.” Rita smiled and draped an arm over Isabella’s shoulder.
Hey Munchkin. Anything exciting happen since we last talked?” Isabella nodded excitedly.
“Po called.” Rita raised an eyebrow to tease her Though she could understand her excitement. She knew how important Paul was to Isabella.
“How is he these days?” Rita asked.
“He’s fine. He was just checking in with me. You know the usual stuff. Gram’s what’s for dinner?” She continued steering the conversation elsewhere. Rita noted the sudden subject change. Usually she could go on and on about her conversation with Paul.
“Since it’s your weekend at home. I decided to cook you your favourite.” Isabella smiled
“Barbercue grilled chicken and mashed potatoes.” Fran nodded.
“Wow, thanks Grams. I might jump in the shower and I’ll help when I get out okay.” Isabella grabbed her bag and planted a kiss on both Fran and Rita’s cheeks before flying up the stairs. Her head had begun to pound, she hoped a long hot shower would help. It did, but only a little.
Isabella sat on the chair beside the bench as she helped Rita chop the vegetables, while Fran marinated and grilled the chicken.
“Hey guys I’m home.” They heard Sam yell from the front door. Isabella got up from her chair and walked over to Sam and hugged her.
“Still growing I see Stretch.” Isabella teased keeping her arms around her.
“No Iz, you’re just shrinking.” Sam threw back
“Is that right?” Isabella asked with a twinkle in her eye. Knowing what would be following Sam took it back quickly. Isabella was the worst tickler in the world, almost as bad as her father.
“No, no. Just kidding IZ.” She said retreating carefully towards her Grandmother and Mom.
“Hey Ma, Grams. Dad and Gramps home?” she asked as she kissed them both hello.
“I’m here Squirt.” Sam turned around to see her Dad come down the stairs. She rushed over to him and threw her arms around him.
“Dad I threw a three pointer. Five times!!!”
“Hey Pumpkin that awesome. Proud of you baby. What do you say, you up for a little one on one with your old man?” Sam nodded eagerly. She loved playing basketball with her Dad. Both of them turned to Isabella who spoke up before they could ask.
“You guys are on your own. I’m beat and I still have hours of reading ahead of me. Maybe tomorrow.” Satisfied with the answer, Father and Daughter headed out the door.
“You okay Iz?” Rita finally asked, unable to help herself any longer. Isabella smiled, knew that Rita had been controlling the question for hours now, and was quite proud that she lasted as long as she did.
“Yeah Ree, Just a little out of it because of Midterms. I’ve been up every night for the last couple of weeks, and when I finally get to sleep I have to wake up again. I guess it’s taken it’s toll. I’m okay, really. Just exhausted.”
“Well you take it easy and don’t overdo it.” Fran said motherly. Rita could sense that there was something more and made a point of locking eyes with Isabella who squirmed uncomfortably in her seat.
“Grams I might lie down before dinner. You know try to catch some sleep so I can study for a little bit tonight.”
“Go ahead dear. Rita will wake you once your Gramps gets home. So we can have a family dinner together. “ Isabella nodded meekly. Her headache had grown worse and all she wanted to do was sleep it off. Isabella dragged herself up the stairs and barely made it to her bedroom. Rita watched her as she slowly walked up the stairs, concerned. Isabella barely made it to her bed before blacking out once more. Rita followed her and found her asleep in a fetal position on top of her bed. Harry arrived an hour later, by that time both Chris and Sam had showered already.
“I’ll go wake Iz.” Rita volunteered getting up from the couch. Rita sat on the edge of Isabella’s bed and brushed her hair away from her face. Isabella stirred and opened her eyes. She smiled up at Rita,
“Gramps here?” Rita nodded in reply.
“Are you going to tell me what’s going on or what?” Isabella’s smile faded at the question. She tried to avoid Rita’s stare but faltered,
“I’ve just been getting really bad headaches that’s all.”
“And…” Rita waited for her to continue, sensing that there was more to it than that.
“I blacked out, a couple of times….okay, a few times.”
“Oh Iz…”
“Don’t get all motherly on Ree. I’m okay. I’m just stressed out that’s all. Please, can we just drop this.” Isabella got up and headed for the door, before walking out she looked back at Rita.
“I appreciate you’re worried and that you’re concerned about me. But I’m okay. I’m just stressed. That’s all. I promise, I’ll take better care of myself.” Without waiting for an answer Isabella went to the bathroom and went through her bag and pulled out a small container, she took out a small pill and swallowed. She composed herself before heading downstairs to dinner.
“Hey how’s my favourite Gramps?” Isabella called out as she walked down the stairs. Harry’s eyes lit up as he saw her. He had grown to love her the way he loved Rita and Sam. There were only four women in his life and he loved them all dearly.
“How’s my other angel going? Come here Angel, give Gramps a little sugar.” Isabella walked into his spread out arms and planted a kiss on his nose.
“How’s that Gramps?”
“Beautiful Baby Girl.” Isabella blushed.
“Need any help Grams. I’m starved.” Fran waved her offer off.
“No just take a seat an everything’s ready.” Isabella avoided Rita altogether. She could feel her eyes on her and tried her best to ignore it. Chris threw both of them a puzzled look. Isabella continued to pretend to be oblivious to it all.
After dinner Isabella excused herself straight after dinner, using her studying as an excuse. She wished she’d turned down Chris’s pleading to come home that weekend. It would have saved the tension between her and Rita. Chris found Isabella with her head resting on her books with her eyes closed. She heard him knock and pretended not to hear it. She hoped she could pass of sleeping successfully.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Isabella opened her eyes. She knew that she hadn’t fooled him.
“Because there’s nothing to tell. I’m just stressed. That’s all.”
“You know as well as I do that it’s not as simple as that.”
Isabella rose from her bed.
“Why can’t it be Chris? Why does everything have to be more when it comes to me.”
“You know why Iz.” Chris reasoned.
“Look I’m okay now. I wish you’d just leave it at that. I’m okay.” Isabella grabbed her jacket and walked passed him. She ran down the stairs and got into her car. Thankful that she had her own car to get around in. Chris tried to run after her but couldn’t catch up. Rita met him at the door.
“You want to fill me in on everything Sam?” Chris sat down and put his head into his hands.
“When I first met up with Isabella’s Mom I didn’t immediately meet Iz. At first I assumed it was because she went away for school. So one day I asked my Aunt if Isabella was coming home for the weekend, that’s when she told me that Isabella wasn’t away at school, she was in the hospital for treatments.” Chris looked up into Rita’s eyes,
“Isabella is in remission for Cancer. When she was thirteen she was diagnosed with Cancer of the Brain. The tumor was small which is why she was able to fight it, but her Doctor said there were no guarantees, that it could show up again. She’s been clear for the last five years. When I arrived, she was in the last stages of her Chemo, by the time she was fifteen or sixteen, she was clear.”
“Why didn’t your Aunt tell you about Iz as soon as you moved in?” Rita questioned, curious.
“Because Isabella begged her not to. She didn’t want me to feel sorry for her, fuss over her, the way everyone else did, because everyone else had been there from the very beginning. So when I first met up with her I pretended I didn’t know. It wasn’t until later on that I admitted I had known. Before she came here she made me promise not to tell you guys.”
“That explains why she was so upset that I questioned her about her health and seeing someone for it.” Chris nodded.
“It also explains why her parents are so protective of her. Chris what are you going to do? Will you call her parents?”
“I want to. They have a right to know. Even if I know that Isabella will never forgive me for it.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chris stood up from where he sat and went into Harry’s study to call his Aunt and Uncle. Isabella sat in her dorm wondering what she was going to do next. She was furious. She should have covered it up better. She shouldn’t have come home to the Lipshitz’s house that weekend knowing that the pain was increasing, but she couldn’t refuse Chris. She never could. She knew without a doubt he’d call her parents. Everything was turning out exactly the way she didn’t want it to. So she wasn’t surprised an hour later when there was a knock on her door. She opened the door apprehensively, Chris stood outside her door with his hands in his pocket. As she looked in her eyes she saw rage.
“How dare you come here and not tell me. What gives you the right to come into our lives keeping something like this a secret?” His anger didn’t surprise her. In fact she knew she deserved what he was giving her. Isabella remained silent controlling herself, trying to prevent herself from bursting into tears. Chris couldn’t even look at her. Isabella felt bad for bringing this upon him. It wasn’t fair. Isabella looked up and leaned over to plant a kiss on Chris’s cheek.
“I’m sorry Chris. Please tell the others too.” As she stepped back and about to close the door, she whispered.
“Don’t worry Chris. You never have to deal with me again.”
Chris stood there not knowing what to do next. He was so angry at her that he didn’t know what to say. He knew what his heart was saying, but his lips just wouldn’t move. His heart wanted him to throw his arms around her and protect her from the harshness of the world, but he couldn’t. He was in too much shock.
As Chris went straight to the beach, Isabella began to pack. She knew coming was a mistake. She should have just stayed home, but she wanted to see Chris. She wanted to spend some time with him. Before…she was in the middle of her thoughts when her cell phone began to ring. She was hesitant to answer it, but she did.
“Hey Izzybear. I heard. You okay.” Isabella could no longer contain it and began to cry uncontrollably.
“Oh Po. This was a mistake. I should have stayed there like everyone told me. He’s so angry with me.”
“Oh Iz, did you expect him to react any other way.”
“But Po…”
“Iz, bottom line is you went there to say goodbye. How did you expect him to take the news.” As the words came out, he realized how harshly he had put them, but he was angry too. He had taken away their chance to be together. He remembered when she had told him that she was going to spend some time overseas with Chris. She knew that she had taken a turn for the worst. Chris was the brother she never had and loved him, and her wish was to spend time with him. She had never told anyone the time frame, for the moment she was strong. The moment she could feel anything she promised them all she’d fly back. She guessed the time had come.
“I know Po. I’m taking the next flight out. I think it’s tomorrow night. I could leave in the morning but there isn’t a flight that goes straight home. Besides I have loose ends at school to tie up.”
“Iz, you can’t just leave without saying anything.”
“He doesn’t want to talk to me Po. But I won’t leave without saying goodbye to Sam.”
“You owe them more than that Isabella.” Paul’s frankness surprised her. He’s never taken that tone of voice with her before and it hurt.
“I’m sorry Iz, but you’re not playing fair.”
“And you think what’s happening is fair?”
“No I don’t. But Iz, you can’t leave like that. You’ll never forgive yourself, neither will he. He’ll never forgive you or himself, is that what you want. For him to regret this for the rest of his life?” Isabella sighed.
“Stay the week. At least. Then after a week come back. Give it time to just settle. You owe it to yourself too.” She knew that he was right, that he had a point. Reluctantly agreed.
“Okay. Tell my parents I’m making arrangements to go back okay.”
“I will. How are you feeling?”
“It’s getting worse Po. It hurts all the time now.”
“Oh Iz.”
“I’ll be okay. I’ll be there in a week.”
“Okay. See you then. Love you.”
“I love you too.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chris sat on the beach lost in his thoughts. He was so absorbed that he didn’t hear Rita sit beside him.
“Chris.” Chris looked up surprised.
“Hey Sam.”
“You okay Chris?” she asked. Chris shrugged his shoulder.
“How do I comprehend that my twenty one year old cousin may not even make it to her twenty second birthday?”
“Oh Sam, I don’t think it’s one of those things that can ever be comprehendible. It’s a lousy card to be dealt, but it happened. Chris you have to talk to her.” She could tell from looking at him that he didn’t talk to her the way he should have.
“I turned on her Sam. I told her she had no right to come into our lives and put us through this.”
“Oh Sam, she just wanted to spend time with you.”
“I know, I was just so angry.” He said frustrated.
“She knows that Sam. She’ll understand.” Rita rested her chin on his shoulder.
“She loves you an awful lot Christopher.”
“I don’t deserve her love for me.”
“Yeah you do. We’re all lucky to be loved by her.” Rita said comfortingly.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Isabella contemplated on returning to the Lipshitz’s household but decided against it. The time apart would give them all the opportunity to let it all sink in. Isabella could understand Chris’s anger. Though it had hurt her, she understood completely. The next day Isabella turned up to Sam’s basketball game and stayed in the shadows. She watched the people that had become her family in the months that had just passed and her heart sank. She would miss them so much. During half time Isabella went outside for a little while to catch some fresh air. She sat on the bench, digging her shoes into the dirt.
“Hey you, quit playing with the dirt.” Startled Isabella looked up to find Rita walking towards her. Isabella gave her a soft smile as she sat beside her.
“He told you?” Rita nodded. Isabella sighed. Though she didn’t mind Rita knew, she wished that no one knew.
“Why didn’t you say anything earlier Iz?” Rita asked quietly,
“Because I didn’t want or need anyone’s sympathy. Besides, there were no guarantees that I wasn’t going to get better. There was still a tiny hope. That and I didn’t want Chris to treat me like wilting flower. He was bad enough knowing that I once had Cancer, just how protective could he possibly have been knowing that I have Cancer.”
“How is he?” Isabella asked concerned.
“Iz, knowing your cousin the way you do and how much he loves you, how do you think he’s doing?”
“I’m so sorry Rita. Maybe coming here was a big mistake. Maybe it would have been better if…” Before Isabella could continue Rita stopped her.
“No Iz. Don’t think that. He’s just trying to deal with this the best way he can, but it doesn’t mean he wished you’d never come. You know him better than that.”
“But I hurt him Rita. That was the last thing I wanted to do, and I know I’m hurting you too. I’m sorry.” Rita pulled Isabella towards her,
“Don’t you ever apologize for being a part of our lives, you don’t know how much it means to all of us to have gotten to know you.” “You’re cousin is just trying to deal with it.”
“Aren’t we all.” Isabella muttered to herself. Isabella stood up,
Listen Rita, I might go. I’ll see if I can catch Sam in the locker room. I want to drop by the Lipshitz’s house and grab my stuff. I leave in a few days.”
Rita’s head snapped,Your what?"
“I’m just waiting to talk to Chris. But I’m going home straight after. I promised everyone I would return, when I knew it’s close.” As she spoke so boldly Rita’s heart trembled. Rita stood up and grabbed Isabella and held her close. Isabella could hardly breathe from her embrace.
“I love you” Rita whispered into her ear. At that point the tears began to pour uncontrollably from both of them.
“I love you too Ree.”
Chris watched them from where he stood, he came looking for Rita to let her know that the game was starting up again in five minutes when he saw them in each other’s arms. Isabella looked up and saw Chris, She broke free from Rita and wiped her eyes.
“I’m going to go…please tell Sam I’m sorry. I’ll talk to her later…”
“Iz,” Rita began to protest but Isabella shook her head. She didn’t want to ruin the game for Chris. Before she could walk to her car Chris stopped her.
“Isabella” His hand caught her arm as he spoke her name. Isabella closed her eyes. Without a thought, she leaned her face on his chest and wrapped her arms around his waist. Chris’s arms automatically enveloped her as she trembled in his arms.
“Baby, I’m so sorry.”
“I’m sorry too.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Rita walked back into the Gym to find that the game had started. She sat back down between Fran and Harry. They didn’t know what was going on, and they knew better to ask. Rita and Chris didn’t feel it was right for them to divulge such information without Isabella’s permission.
“You okay honey?” Fran asked worried noticing the redness of her eyes.
“I’ll be okay Fran.” She answered trying to compose herself.
Isabella held on tightly to Chris not saying a word. She continued to sob in his arms as Chris felt his own tears begin to flow out of his eyes. Isabella was trembling, she wanted nothing more than for everything to go away. That she would be okay. Chris tried to find the words of comfort, but he himself didn’t know what or how to feel.
“I’m so scared”
“Me too baby. Me too. But I’m here. I’ll always be here.” Isabella broke free reluctantly,
“Sam’s game. We have to finish watching.” Isabella wanted nothing more than to stay in his arms but it wasn’t fair for her to depend on him. It was hard enough as it was. Chris could tell what she was doing, but let it go.
“Okay, but we talk as soon as it finishes. Promise me.” Isabella nodded.
“I owe you that.” Before Isabella could walk away Chris pulled her into his arms again holding on to her tightly.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After Sam’s game Isabella went home to the Lipshitz’s, soon after they arrived she and Chris went for a walk. Hand in hand, cousins walked to their favorite place. Side by side they sat, Chris waited for her to start talking.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you Chris. I really am. I guess I just wanted to believe so badly that it would just go away that I convinced myself that it had. Being here, being with you, it made me want that even more. The truth is, deep down I always knew I was on borrowed time. I’ve known it for quite some time. I just didn’t want to not see you, before…so I convinced them to let me go. I guess my parents saw it as a one last wish thing, so they let me go. They agreed to let me tell you. And I wanted to, but I didn’t want you to fuss over me, that’s not what I wanted. I just wanted to spend time with you.”
“Oh Iz, I’m not mad at you. I’m mad at the situation.”
"Chris?"
“Yeah Iz.”
“I have so much to say and I don’t know what to say.”
“Just say how you feel”
“Okay… You know what?” she asked looking at him taking his hand in hers,
“What?” Chris asked,
“When I was a little, I always wanted a big brother. I mean I had Charlie and Vincent and the others, but they were all someone else’s brother. I wanted one of my very own. Someone who loved me, and looked out for me. And whenever I had a bad day, I would think about what my big brother would do?” Chris squeezed her hand and smiled
“Oh yeah? So how did you see it?”
“He was tough and strong. He would love me, look out for me, protect me, and he’d make everything all better.” Isabella watched Chris lower his head, Isabella pulled his chin so she could look at him in the eye,
Listen, I know you would make it all better if you could. Anyways, I got my wish, I got my big brother.”
“No where near long enough.” He answered sadly
“No, no where near long enough, but people can love each other a whole life time and it could still be no where near long enough. The time I had with you Chris, they were very precious to me. I cherish every second of it.”
“I wish there were some way I could protect you from this. I wish I could just make it all go away.”
“I know.” She said soothingly
“I’ve always tried to face my enemies head on, but I don’t know how to face this. I don’t know how to fight this. I don’t know how to protect you from this. I feel helpless” Chris shook his head from frustration. Isabella took his face with both hands as she spoke,
“Listen, you and I, we’re not made of glass, we’re not going to shatter.”
Chris could no longer contain himself and pulled her into his arms once more, holding onto her for dear life. While Isabella talked to Chris she felt overwhelmingly calm. The hard part was over, she had finally told him.
“Chris,” Isabella spoke up quietly. Isabella leaned back against his chest as his arms remained around her.
“I have to go home, soon.” There was an urgency in her voice and he knew why.
“I’ll go with you.”
“No Chris, we say our goodbye’s here.” Isabella lifted her head to look up at him as he shook his head.
“I want to be with you.”
“Ditto, but no. It stops here. I don’t want you traveling all that way just to watch me…just so…No Chris.” Isabella couldn’t complete her sentence. Chris wanted to protest but her adamancy was evident and she won.
“When?” he asked.
“A couple of days, till the end of the week if I can.” She answered, her voice broke. Chris remained silent and responded by holding her tighter than he already was.
“Let’s go back Chris. I can’t put off talking to the rest of the family forever.” Chris kissed the top of her head.
“I’ll be right there with you baby bear.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Oh my Lord!” Cried out Fran. Harry rushed to her side, fearing that she would collapse. Rita held onto Sam tightly as Chris’s arms remained around Isabella’s shoulders.
“Gramps, Grams, are you guys mad at me?” Isabella asked in a small voice. Fran and Harry lifted their heads to look at Sam and began to shake their heads profusely.
“No Angel, of course we’re not mad at you. We love you.” Harry walked over to where Isabella sat and stroked her hair.
“It’s just a shock sweetie, that’s all. But we’re not mad at you.” Sam broke free from her mother’s embrace and ran into Sam’s arms.
“It’s not fair” Sam sobbed. Isabella hugged her and kissed the top of her head repeatedly.
“I know stretch, I feel that too sometimes, but I’m still here. I don’t regret the time we’ve spent together. I’d rather have that for the short time we did than a lifetime without it. We’re lucky kiddo. We both have so many people who love us so much. Four of them are standing before us now.” Chris bit his lower lip, trying his hardest to hold back the tears, the rage, the anguish. He leaned forward and buried his head on Isabella’s shoulder. Isabella leaned her head against Chris’s, not letting go of Sam.
Sam fell asleep in Isabella’s arms on the couch. Harry and Fran went for a walk to clear their heads while Chris and Rita went to attempt preparing a very late lunch. Isabella got up carefully and placed a blanket over Sam. She found Rita in the kitchen alone. Her eyes we red as she moved swiftly around the kitchen. Rita looked up as Isabella entered the room. Without a word, without a thought Isabella walked over to Rita and wrapped her arms around her. Rita’s arms encircled her, holding her tightly as they both trembled. Chris walked down the stairs finding them in each other’s arms. He knew how important Isabella had become to Rita. She was like the little sister Rita always longed for. They had become so close in the months that passed. Isabella was the one who was with Rita constantly. Who took Sam to her practices with her, went shopping with her. He also knew that Isabella was the only one Rita confided in. She had become a substitute for him in certain ways. What Rita couldn’t talk to him about, she talked to Isabella about. He knew that the news crushed Rita, especially after Michael. Chris quietly walked back up the stairs, giving them the space to be with each other.
“Ree, promise me something?” Isabella stepped back from Rita’s embrace.
“What is it sweetie?”
“That one day real soon you’ll be honest to yourself. About what you feel about Chris. If you love him, put aside the hurt, pride and whatever else it is that’s preventing you from being true to yourself. I think you both have paid for it already. Isn’t almost thirteen years of being apart enough of a punishment for both of you? I’m sorry if I’m pressuring you. Life is unbelievably short and I don’t want you to miss out on something you so deserve.”
“I know kiddo.”
“And Ree, promise me you’ll take care of him. I mean he’s holding up now, but after I’m gone. He’s going to need someone there. Promise me that you’ll make sure he knows that, you’re that person. No one knows him the way you do. Not even me. He’s going to push you away, but you already know that, but don’t give up on him. He needs you.” Rita nodded unable to speak. She could barely keep herself together, she couldn’t believe what they were talking about.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
For the next couple of days they all stayed home and spent every waking moment together, even some of their sleep time was spent together. After everyone had gone to bed, Chris would head on up to Isabella’s room and they spent most of the night talking.
“Chris?” Isabella said quietly.
“What’s up?” he asked kissing the top of her head. Isabella sat against his chest on her bed. She looked up at him and laced her fingers with his as she spoke.
“There’s something I have to tell you.”
“What is it?”
“I wanted to tell you before, but I didn’t know how. And, now…Chris please don’t be mad at me.”
“Of course I won’t Iz.”
“I didn’t know this till after you left, it’s what made me even more determined to see you.”
“It’s okay Iz, just tell me.”
“Benny Lorenzo is also my father.” Chris sat up straight and turned her around to face him. When he did he saw the tears that began to flow down her cheeks.
“Apparently my real mother died while I was being born and Benny had no idea what to do with me so he took me to the only living relatives he had. No matter how distant of a relation. He made Mom and Dad promise never to tell me, and they had no intention of telling me, especially after I got sick. They thought it would upset me. They never anticipated that you would actually find your way to Sydney. Then they saw the way we were with each other and how close we naturally were. They knew then that they couldn’t keep Benny’s secret anymore. That they owed us the truth. They were about to tell us when you got the call about Gramps. You had to go, so they told me. Then I got sick again and I begged them to let me spend my last days with you. Whether it be a year, more or less. Chris…” Chris’s face was in total shock. His mind raced.
“That explains a lot.”
“Please don’t be mad.” Chris pulled her towards him and held her tightly, burying his face in her hair.
“Baby I’m not mad. How could you ever think I’d be mad at you. I just, it’s just…”
“I know Chris. I thought that too. I’m just glad I found out at all. I mean I’d hate to have never found out at all.”
“I know, I just wish I knew earlier.”
“Why Chris? It wouldn’t it have made you love me more or less would it?”
“No of course not. I just wish we had more time.”
“Me too, but there’s nothing we can do about it. We had some great times Chris. Focus on that.”
“I’m trying baby, but…” Without a word, she turned around and wrapped her arms around her brother.
I love you Chris.”
“I love you Iz.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Isabella fell asleep in Chris’s arms. After she had been asleep for awhile he carefully got up. His mind wouldn’t stop whirling. He went to his room and grabbed his sneakers before heading out for a midnight jog. Rita heard the door close behind him.
“Hey partner. Mind if I join you?” Chris looked up startled and shook his head, patting the empty spot beside him on the rock. They sat in silence for a little while before Chris ended it.
“She’s my sister.” Rita was shocked but it only seemed natural. Their bond, and if she thought about it their similarities were extraordinary. In looks and in manner.
“Whoa Chris. I don’t know what to say.”
“Get in line Sam. I mean I’m glad to know she is, but in dealing with that. I have to deal with all the time we’ve lost too.”
“It must have been so hard for her not to tell you. After knowing that…” Rita couldn’t finish her sentence, and she didn’t have to.
“It just keeps getting worse and worse.”
“She loves you an awful lot.”
“The feeling is mutual. I’ve wanted nothing more than a sister when I was growing up, and now I have one. Now that I do, how do I swallow the fact that she has only weeks to live if not a month or so?” Rita pulled Chris into her arms. Chris began to tremble a little before giving into his grief and openly cried in Rita’s arms.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hand in hand Chris and Rita walked back to the Lipshitz’s home. Just before they were about to enter Rita stopped walking. Chris turned and moved closer to her, not letting go of her hand.
“I love you Sam. I always have, and still do. I don’t want to hide behind all the anger, or everything that’s happened. I’m tired of it. I love you.” Rita’s mouth began to quiver as she spoke. Chris’s face broke into a huge grin and hugged her tightly.
“I love you too Sam. That’s never changed. Time has not changed nor lessened that.”
Isabella smiled as she saw them in each other’s arms. She had woken up after Rita had walked out to follow Chris. She had been sitting outside her window since, unable to sleep. She held her breath till they were inside and climbed back into her room and slipped into her bed, knowing Chris and Rita would pop their head in to check on her and on Sam, just as they did every night before going to bed. She closed her eyes when she heard their footsteps. Isabella immediately felt their presence in her room as they entered. Chris sat down on her bed beside her to turn the light off as Rita pulled her covers and tucked them under her chin.
“Sweet dreams Iz.” Rita whispered in her ear before planting a kiss on her forehead. Chris leaned over and rested his cheeks against Isabella’s and whispered.
“You’re truly my special gift in life.”
After they had left her room Isabella stayed in her cocooned state and looked up at the ceiling. How she was going to miss Chris, Rita, Sam, the Lipshitz’s. Everything. But everything she had hoped would happened, had. She got to spend quality time with Chris, got to know Rita and Sam, and even watched Rita and Chris reunite. It was time to head home.
Isabella got up early and smiled when she that Chris wasn’t in his bedroom. She grabbed a bottle of water before heading out for her jog. She needed to clear her mind and find the courage to do what she had to. After she got back an hour later she found Chris and Rita in the kitchen. It seemed so natural to find Rita flipping the pancakes with Chris’s arms around her waist. She greeted them both with a huge smile and kisses on both their cheeks.
“Hey guys. Lovely morning isn’t it? But you don’t need me to tell you that do you?” she teased cheekily
“Watch it Squirt.” Chris said lunging towards her. Isabella leapt back laughing.
“I’m heading up for a shower. I’ll be down soon.”
Rita caught Chris’s wistful look as he watched his baby sister run up the stairs. Rita wrapped her arms around his waist and rested her chin on his shoulder. Chris placed his hands over hers.
“I don’t want her to go.”
“I know Sam.”
Chris smiled as she called him Sam. He hadn’t called her that in so long, Ever since they had parted so many years before.
Isabella got out of the shower and stood in front of the mirror, psyching herself up for the inevitable. Sam found her there and gently knocked on the door. Isabella looked up held her arms out to her. Sam walked into them and rested her head on Isabella’s shoulder.
“What am I going to do without you Iz?”
“You’ll be fine. Besides, near or far I’ll always be with you. Sam, you’re surrounded by people you love and people who love you. Let them. I love you, I always will. If ever you miss me, just think back to all our crazy times together, and laugh about it. And if you stand still enough, you’ll hear me laughing beside you.”
“I love you too Iz. I’m going to miss you so much.”
“Me too Stretch. Me too.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Aunt and niece walked down to breakfast together. Isabella’s eyes met all of theirs as she sat down. She cleared her throat.
“It’s time I go home.” Chris looked up violently, Rita leaned on the nearest thing beside her, Sam wiped her tears, while the Lipshitz’s held unto one another.
“I want to thank you, for making me a part of your family. But it’s time I head back to mine. I promised them, and I owe it to them, to be there.”
After breakfast Isabella went to pack, Chris followed. Silently he helped her fold her clothes.
“I’m coming with you, and you can’t stop me.” Isabella turned around and grinned.
“I should have known you weren’t going to let me.”
“In fact it was a unanimous decision, we’re all going.” Rita said walking into her room throwing an arm around her.
“Even if I wanted to protest you wouldn’t let me anyway, so why fight it? Thanks guys. It means a lot.”
For a moment everyone was caught up in the excitement of going to Sydney, but the thought of the why they were going was never too far from their minds.
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At the airport they were greeted by Isabella’s parents and of course Paul.
“Izzybear” Paul screamed excitedly as he waited for his turn to embrace her. As soon as her parents released her from their tearful grip she was pulled into his.
“Missed you bear.”
“Me too Po. Me too.”
“Guys, this is my best friend Paul…Paul this is everyone” Isabella said giving him a brief introduction. Rita and Chris smiled over their heads noting the fact that Isabella did not step out of Paul’s arms. When they arrived at Isabella’s house they found the very many cousins she had waiting for them, by this time Isabella was in tears. She realized just how much she missed them all.
That night after a long day full of relatives and everyone had finally gone home and gone to bed, Paul lingered. He and Isabella sat outside in her front patio talking side by side.
“Missed you Bear…” He repeated once more. Isabella looked at him and grinned. She playfully nudged him and rested her head on his shoulder.
“I missed you too Po. Especially the last few weeks, when things began to get worse. I remember when I used to get the headaches and you’d sit there with me, doing everything you could just so I wouldn’t think about it.”
“I wish I could have been there for you.” He whispered.
“You were. Really. Thinking about it made me feel better, even if you weren’t physically there, you were there with me, in the most important way. In my heart. Po?”
“Yeah Iz?”
Promise me something?” Isabella realized that those were words she was using a lot the last weeks.
“That you won’t mourn for me.”
“Iz, stop.” He said trying to silence her.
“No Po. Don’t waste your time mourning for me, or blaming God or anything like that. We always knew we were on borrowed time.” She completed quietly.
“One question…”
“What’s that?”
“Is that why you always made a point of us never having the possibility of even becoming more than friends?” Isabella shrugged her shoulders but nodded.
“I guess. I guess I always feared that this moment would come and leaving you would be painful enough as friends, but if we went that step further then it would be worse, and it wouldn’t be fair to you. Your first love deserves all of you and you deserve all your first love has to offer, and I knew I couldn’t fulfill that. I didn’t want to rob you of your first love. If that even makes sense.” Paul took her hand in his and lifted her chin to face him.
“Don’t you know whether or not you let me, you’re still my first love. I love you Isabella, I always have and I always will. Regardless your time…” Isabella’s eyes began to fill with tears. Paul leaned closer, she could feel his breath against her face. Isabella closed her eyes as Paul placed his lips upon hers. For a moment they were both lost in each other, forgetting reality. Paul pulled her closer to him and held her tightly. Isabella buried her face against his chest, engulfing herself in his hug, his touch, his smell.
“I love you too Po.” She whispered. Paul smiled without saying a word and just held her tighter.
After Paul had gone home Isabella walked into the kitchen to grab herself a drink. She was startled by Chris’s footsteps.
“You scared me Christopher. What are you doing up so late?”
“One could ask you the same question pumpkin.” Isabella smiled and tossed a bottle of juice in his direction. Chris caught it and sat down on the table. Isabella grabbed the Pringles from the cupboard and sat across from Chris.
“Paul just went home. We had a few things to talk about.” Chris noticed the huge sigh Isabella took and raised an eyebrow. Isabella smiled and placed a hand over Chris’s.
“Not now okay?” Chris nodded. He understood. He had a pretty good idea what she and Paul talked about.
“You talked to Mom?” Isabella asked changing the topic all together. Chris nodded and began to shake his head.
“I can’t believe he never told us.”
“Maybe he didn’t know how. Chris, I’ve never met Benny before.”
“What?”
“Well he gave me up when I was born and he’s never seen me before. I guess he didn’t want to interfere with my parents bringing me up. It doesn’t really bother me, I mean the man wanted nothing to do with me and I could live with that.”
“But…” Chris interrupted. Isabella gave his hand a gentle squeeze.
“I know. But you can’t be bitter about it forever. When I die, promise you’re going to let that anger die too.”
As she boldly said the words die, Chris shivered. He looked up to meet her gaze and refused to promise her that he would. He pulled her into his arms and held her tightly. Isabella knew that, that was the best answer she was going to receive from him.
Rita was still awake when Chris walked into the guest bedroom.
“You okay Sam?” she asked.
“She asked me to forgive Benny. I don’t even know how to ever look at him again. It’s all his fault. It’s his fault that we never met. I mean he never even bothered to tell me. Nor did he bother to even meet her. How could she not hate him for that? How could she even want me to stop hating him? To forgive him, how Sam?”
Rita sat beside him and ran her fingers through his hair.
“Because she loves you. Because she knows you, she knows that you will carry this forever and she doesn’t want that. She doesn’t want you to hate Benny for the rest of your life, not because of Benny, but because of you. Chris, she realizes that you and her are lucky, because you and she got the chance to meet. Grant it, it wasn’t for as long as you would have wanted, but you did. You got to know each other, love each other. You guys have more than Benny could even possibly dream of. He lost. He never met her and he never got to know either of you. That’s his mistake, that’s his consequence. One day he’ll realize and it’ll be too late. If you carry this anger within you, to refuse yourself of any possibility of ever being a family with Benny, you’re no better than he is by turning his back on you and Isabella. Isabella knows this and doesn’t want you to make the same mistake. She wants the family feud to end there. The hurt to end after she goes. You gotta give her that Chris. It’s the very least she deserves.” Rita pulled Chris into her arms and held him as he shook.
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Rita brushed strands of Isabella’s hair away from her face. She sat there staring at her and couldn’t help but be saddened by what they were all losing. Isabella woke to find Rita sitting on the edge of her bed. She opened her eyes and gave a small smile. It hurt to see the sadness in all of them.
“Hey you.” Rita smiled.
“Hey kiddo. You up for a sunrise jog?” Isabella smiled.
“Sure am.” Isabella threw her covers back and grabbed her running gear before heading into the bathroom to change and brush her teeth. Isabella and Rita ran for awhile in the darkness not speaking. It wasn’t until they got to the very top of the hill overlooking the suburb was a word exchanged.
“What’s on the agenda for today?” Isabella asked. Trying to talk about anything else but what they needed to talk about.
“I think your Mom’s planned a family picnic on the beach or something. Family and friends, we leave after breakfast today. She talked about spending the weekend there. She said you asked her to arrange it, that you wanted to go there.”
“Will everyone be there?” Isabella asked. Rita turned to look at Isabella. She noticed how tired she seemed and wished she hadn’t dragged her out at dawn.
“Yeah, your Mom was calling everyone while you and Paul were outside.” Isabella grinned. She remembered the night before. Without hesitation she gave Rita a light nudge.
“He told me he loved me.” Although that wasn’t a new thing, Rita realized to what extent she meant. Rita threw an arm across Isabella’s shoulder and hugged her.
“Told you so.” She replied smugly. Isabella looked into Rita’s eyes.
“I wanted you to be the first to know that, because you’re the only one who really knows how I feel. You’re the only one who knows what I’m going to miss out on. I wanted to share this moment of my life with you and only you. This is my secret. I know everyone assumes it already, but you’re the only one I want to tell.” As Isabella began to ramble Rita knew what she was trying to say. No one knew better than her what Isabella was losing, and Isabella was trying to tell her to make sure never to make the same mistake again. That through her, she has a chance to live out the fairytale she knew she couldn’t have.
“I love him so much Ree. I do. I don’t want him to mourn the rest of my life for me, yet the thought that there would be someone else, hurts like hell. It’s these moments that I think why me? But then, I realize I have so much to be thankful for and I shouldn’t question anything else because I got more than I ever thought I would, more than I ever thought I deserved.”
“Oh Iz…I wish there were some profound words I could share with you. There’s so many things I want to say to you, but I don’t know what to say.” Isabella clasped her hands with Rita’s.
“Don’t worry, whether you say it or not. I know your heart. I know you.” Tears began to fall from both their eyes.
“I love you kid.”
“I love you too Ree.”
After they got back from their run they had a quick breakfast before getting ready for the day. They were meeting with everyone at Isabella’s house. The commotion was amusing to Isabella and she loved every minute of it. The Beach house they were headed to was their family vacation house. During their summers all of her cousins and family would spent their time there. Isabella loved the place completely. She and Chris used to drive down on weekends sometimes just to hang out for a day or two. The day passed filled with laughter and joy. They swam, played beach volleyball, played cards, ran after each other. Isabella was full of energy, at first they were scared that she was over-exerting herself, but she made them all relaxed. Isabella spent a lot of time with her parents. She spent time with her cousins, brother, adopted grandparents, niece, future sister in law, her brother and best friend.
After midnight that night her parents bid her goodnight and I love you while giving her a kiss. Followed close behind by the Lipshitz’s. Hours later her cousins, and Sam retired from exhaustion too. Chris and Rita stayed up at the porch while Isabella and Paul sat in front of the fire.
“I’m tired Po.”
“I know Sweetie. Do you want me to bring you upstairs?”
“No Po. I’m too tired. I just want to sleep now.” Paul kissed the top of her head trying his best to hold on to his tears.
“Baby, if you’re tired that’s okay. You can go to sleep. I’ll be here.
I love you.”
“I love you too Po…” she replied tiredly.
“Chris?” she muttered trying her best to keep her eyes open. Paul turned his head to glance at Chris. At that same moment Chris looked up and so the despair in Paul’s face. He and Rita rose immediately and ran to them. Paul got up and gently put Isabella in Chris’s arms and stood back. Rita sat beside Chris and took one of Isabella’s hand in hers. Paul couldn’t bring himself to watch and started to walk away.
“Hey Iz, Rita and I have something to tell you.” He said repeatedly planting kisses on top of her head.
“What’s that Chris?” she answered meekly.
“Rita and I are getting married.”
“That’s so great. Hey Ree can I be a bridesmaid?” she asked. Rita’s eyes began to fill with tears as she answered.
“Are you kidding, you’re my maid of honor.”
“I can’t wait.”
“Could you guys tell Sam I love her, and Grams and Gramps?”
“Sure we will kiddo.”
Chris could feel her begin to fall limp in his arms and he held her tighter, as though if he held her tight enough she couldn’t leave him. It had taken them almost a lifetime to find each other and now that they had, he had to let go of her. He racked his brain to find the right words to say and he couldn’t. He began to cry, his lips quivered as they rested on her head.
“I love you Chris. No regrets.”
“I love you too Baby. Forever and always.”
The last words Isabella heard was that her brother loved her. He held her in his arms for hours, as Rita sat along beside him. When the sun rose Rita left Chris to be alone while she told the rest of the family. Chris rocked Isabella in his arms as he cried out loud. His baby sister was gone.
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Depressed? Sorry, that wasn't my intention. It was just one of those stories that basically wrote itself, and just to drive Lisa nuts I refused to write all of it at one go...you know just to torment her. Those of you who know how demanding she is would understand.
As we all know Chris, Rita, Cap and Frannie do not belong to me....but the rest of the ensemble is a creation of my imagination. Thanks for taking the time to read it.
Thank you to Lisa and Linda for posting it for me.
Especially to Lise who's patience (the rare times that she has them) is extraordinary, her THREATS are encouraging... =) Seriously Lise thank you for forever being there, for every little thing, and for every not so little thing. You know it means the world to me.
That's all folks...Hope you enjoyed reading Places in my heart.
All feedback is encouraged and appreciated. Thanks...Lissy